Killer

Ommigod I’m a killer – a huge MASSIVE cockroach came in the window last night about midnight when I was home alone and I had to deal with it! It was late, I was trying to bore myself to sleep with work (actually I think I was emailing my boss at the time) when something flicked in my hair and bounced away – I looked around to see the massive roach sitting waving it’s feelers at me from the headboard.  I grabbed my phone and jumped off the bed, it jumped onto the light and made little tapping sounds as it walked around the metal lampshade.

I stood there in, paralysed, not quite sure what I thought I’d do with my phone, in my nightee with no shoes on so I couldn’t stamp on it – except I didn’t want to stamp on it because of the crunch and the egg thing. Then it got onto the floor and began darting here and there, man it was fast, and I had to do something – there was no way I was going to sleep with it on the loose. WAAAAAA. I grabbed The Mister’s magazine from beside the bed, but still had the squashing dilemma and it was onto me every time I moved and disappeared under the bed.

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I made the decision to leave it alone while I went to the cupboard under the sink to see if there was some fly spray deciding that I could spray the bedroom, shut the door, block the gap under it and sleep on the couch. But no, it was back on the light by the time I returned with a can of spray  (so old that it was made of metal and had an actual lid). I put on rubber gloves and gummies and I was good for attack. Except that every time I stepped my boots did a silent little pfffft and a puff of air shot up the back of my leg giving me a hell of a fright thinking the roach had gone up the back of my leg!!

So on with the spray, well there was no spray, it was a stream and after a couple of false starts I managed to get a good jetting mini fire hose going and in a crouching slo-mo interpretive dance type move I guided the stream with one hand, magazine held at the ready in the other hand as I guided the squirting stream around the bedroom, out into the hall and into the spare bathroom where it finally started to show signs of weakness behind the door. Suffice to say I finally got my chance with magazine and boot, and yes there was a crunch – don’t want to think about it.

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With the escaped eggs playing on my mind I mopped up the whole kill area with paper towel and disinfectant then had to set about washing the floor in the bedroom, hall and bathroom to get rid of the fly spray – then everything went down the rubbish chute to the basement 30 floors below where any rebirth could be someone else’s problem.

By this time I was roasting: adrenalin and still 30 degrees out and muggy and had to try and sleep without worrying about another one flying in the window to take revenge! Next day I went out and got a new tin of spray, one that actually sprays and is for use around window frames to stop them coming in in the first place. Fingers crossed.

2 comments ↓

#1 Basel Lisa on 07.05.10 at 1:07 pm

Eeeeee! One movie I wouldn’t advise you watching at the moment is “Joe’s Apartment” if you haven’t already seen it: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0116707/

What is it about NYC and roaches?!

#2 SATC week — OrangeBlog on 07.08.10 at 10:32 am

[…] Massive roach came into the bedroom at midnight (and you probably already read about that here). […]

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